Walsall Health beat Lapworth by 155 runs.

Walsall Health marked the passing of their late captain, team mate and friend Tim Oliver with a record-breaking win at Lapworth which, it is generally agreed, he would have ABSOLUTELY loved.

Without a shadow of a doubt the highlight was a devastating performance by Sam Stephens with both the bat and the ball. Sam first knocked 61 on a pitch that was far from conducive to run scoring before duly ripping apart the Lapworth top order with a spell of delicious bowling that saw him end with figures of four wickets for five runs.

The Elf welcomed overseas player Jeremy Brady to the ranks (his Peaky Blinders-style headwear immediately helped win over his new team-mates) while Gareth Preece made his first appearance for a couple of years due to an exile in the Australian Penal Colony meaning three Preece Brothers lined up for the historic game.

The Preece Brothers (Gareth and Dave) opened the batting on a track that began in stubborn fashion. While Dave (still suffering from his stag do the previous evening) ground out nine, Gareth soon rediscovered his touch with the bat and added an impressive 23.

But it was Sam Stephens’ input that really laid the foundations, his score of 61 an impressive array of shots on a slow track and even slower outfield. His cause was helped no end by Andy Gorton – fresh from his spell with IPL Franchise Goa Geriatrics – whose wily use of sweep-shots helped build the total to a competitive one.

A useful partnership by Hewlitt and Danks built things even further before an important cameo by Brady at the end (and a monster six by Hewlitt, the only six of the game) helped The Elf to a total of 183.

Lapworth’s response immediately hit the rocks with Sam Stephens shattering the stumps of Favre for just two in his first over.

Fellow opening bowler Gareth Preece (recovering quickly from an almost decapitating first ball) soon snared the wicket of the other opener McCormick, thanks to an accomplished catch by Hewlitt.

Sam then saw off Wright and McCluskey with two absolute beauties before it was the turn of Stephens Senior to get in on the act, first clean bowling Seeley for six and then tempting Clarke to nudge one up in the air to the dependable hands of Chris Hall.

Hall himself got the wicket his brilliant spell deserved when Winter tried to drive him onto to find Gareth Preece at mid-off.

It was left to the devastating force of Ian Chuck to see off the last residual threat offered by Lapworth, taking both Stephenson and McCormick for ducks leaving the home side with a total of just 28.

Today’s game was a fitting tribute to our late colleague who would have enjoyed the controversy (a couple of glaring decisions didn’t go our way) but most of all the spirit and energy shown by The Elf.

Tim, that one was for you.

Batting		Runs
Preece, D	b Seeley	9
Preece, G	b McCormick	23
Stephens, S	c McGreary b Stephenson	61
Gorton, A	c McCluskey b Favre	38
Danks, M	b Seeley	5
Hewlitt, R	not out	29
Brady, J	run out	3
Stephens, D	dnb
Preece, J	dnb
Chuck, I	dnb
Hall, C	dnb
Extras		15
Walsall Health		183

Bowling	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wickets
Stephens, S	5	3	5	4
Stephens, D	5	3	8	2
Preece, G	3	1	4	1
Hall, C	5	3	5	1
Chuck, I	3	2	1	2
Preece, J	1	0	4	0

 

Man of the match: Sam Stephens

Top bat: Sam Stephens (61)

Top bowler: Sam Stephens 4 for 5

Rachel Hangover Rating: 0/10 (Shocking effort. Rubbish. She could walk in a straight line and touch her nose at the same time and EVERYTHING. The only thing is that we know she is going to be back with a vengeance before long)

Walsall Health beat Darley Abbey by 21 runs.

After a late cancellation saw a hole appearing in Walsall’s early season schedule, excellent work by Sam Stephens led to a first appearance by The Elf at Darley Abbey’s ground on the outskirts of Derby.

Thoroughly delightful people, a magnificent picturesque setting (with the tranquil peace shattered only by a foul-mouthed ginger outburst in the Elf batting innings) and – frankly – the best tea seen by even the most food-obsessed visitor, made for a great sunny Bank Holiday encounter.

Due to the hastily arranged fixture, and with regulars absent (including Andy Gorton flying to India to appear for IPL franchise Goa Geriatrics and with record-busting Chris Hall at the world snooker final) it was an unfamiliar Elf line-up.

Thankfully, three guests from the opposition – Uzzi and Allon Scotton and wicketkeeper Amy Jepson – and debutant Nathan Martin all had a day to remember while Elf stalwart Sam Stephens – who also turns out for Darley Abbey on a Saturday – enjoyed mixed fortunes.

It was debutant Nathan Martin and Elf (semi) regular (and Darley Abbey mainstay) Jamie Icke who perhaps made the most telling contributions in a tight, tense, low-scoring affair.

Batting first, it appeared that the visitors were well set with openers Icke and Rob Hewlitt successfully carving out runs on a pitch that was tough to score on.

But with Hewlitt out for an impressive 25, the tide turned and the Elf found themselves in something of a pickle.

The usual dangermen – Sam Stephens, Dave Stephens, Mat Danks and Dave Preece – were all out for just one run between them, with Danks claiming 100% of that accumulative total.

Thankfully, Icke was able to continue scoring, eventually building a total of 45 before being bowled, while Ian Chuck chipped in with a valuable ten and debutant Martin added a vital 13 to the low Elf total (smashing some cultured drives along the way).

And these runs would prove crucial later on as The Elf battled to a total of 122.

Despite the relatively low target, The Elf did at least have the comfort of having skipper Dave Preece for a full game this week and a handy bowling arsenal to call upon.

The big guns in that arsenal, the Stephens pincer movement, put the screws on the home side from the off.

During their combined 16 overs, the father and son duo of Sam and Dave Stephens leaked a mere 32 runs for 3 wickets with Dave on 23-2 and Sam at his miserly best at 9-1.

Dave Stephens saw off opener Edwards (who had done much of the damage with the ball) for two which set up the partnership which would be the foundation of much of their response.

The partnership of Smith and Gillet, although pegged down by the unerring accuracy and high-pressure bowling served up in particular by the Stephens’, Icke and Martin (who might have grabbed a wicket with his first ball but for a sharp catch dropped at slip), frustrated attempts to remove them.

That was until Icke finally saw off Gillet with a monster delivery for 23.

And then guest player Allon Scotton – who had been not out for four with the bat – took the prize wicket of Smith for 37 thanks to a nifty catch behind the sticks by Jepson.

Scotton’s bowling – and all-round performance was immense – and his figures of 7 for 1 off six overs actually didn’t do justice to his contribution.

With Smith gone, it was a relatively straightforward affair as the pressure built by The Elf both bowling and in the field forced the home side into riskier shots than they would have perhaps liked.

Sam Stephens accounted for the wicket of Wilkinson – who ground out his 11 runs in challenging circumstances – while Ian Chuck contributed an awesome display of tight spin bowling that not only caused all sorts of problems for the batsmen but also saw him nab two wickets key wickets.

Ultimately, the home side fell 21 runs short as The Elf continued their unbeaten run of two games in a fixture that, without exception, all members of the visiting side hope will become a regular affair.

We are particularly grateful to Isaac, Allon and Amy for making themselves available and for their sparkling performances for The Elf which will do their chances for Darley Abbey no harm at all.

Batting		Runs
Icke, J	b Thomas	45
Hewlitt, R	c Darkins b Wilkinson	25
Stephens, S	c Hodgson b Thomas	0
Danks, M	run out	1
Stephens, S	lbw Wilkinson	0
Chuck, I	ct b Edwards	10
Preece, D	run out	0
Scotton, I	ct b Edwards	0
Martin, N	b Da Silva	13
Scotton, A	not out	4
Jepson, A	lbw  Da Silva	0
Extras		24
Walsall Health		122

Bowling	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wickets
Stephens, S	8	3	9	1
Stephens, D	8	1	23	2
Martin, N	4	0	16	0
Chuck, I	8	2	11	2
Icke, J	6	0	23	2
Scotton, A	6	3	7	1

 

Man of the match: Jamie Icke

Top bat: Jamie Icke (45)

Top bowler: Allon Scotton 7 for 1

Dai Preece Hangover Rating: 9/10 (Rachel would have been proud, and it showed in that the scorebook was far more accurate than normal)

Walsall Health and Sportsman drew after rain stopped play.

With crushing inevitability, the weather put paid to an opening day fixture between The Elf and Sportsman which was delicately poised and might have gone either way.

After dismissing the visitors for 109, Walsall were 67 for 7 when a final, fatal wave of weather led to handshakes.

But with Ian Chuck and Chris Hall looking in good shape, and the talismanic Rich Fell still in the hutch, Elf would have fancied their chances had Mother Nature not intervened.

Fielding first, The Elf struck early as Dave Stephens – having spent much of last season on the sidelines – returned in a manner not unlike Nick Cotton, only it wasn’t poor Dot he returned to haunt, it was the opposition batsman.

First he forced Jonny Boukhobza to edge to the ever-reliable Chris Hall and then he clean-bowled Kahn to complete a handy return to the fold.

With Sam Stephens his normal miserly self with the ball, Sportsman found themselves under pressure which enabled Chris Hall and Rich Fell to fill their boots, both grabbing three wickets.

Fell, in particular, showed amazing poise with the ball, a looping full toss straight onto the stumps an absolute highlight.

Although, John Preece’s marvellous grub-hunting effort to dismiss Nasser also promoted plenty of comments of ‘they all count, pal’.

As Fell put the end to a stubborn last wicket partnership by shamelessly bullying a 12-year-old kid, The Elf realised the brooding weather might be an issue.

And so it proved.

Skipper Dave Preece was forced to return on a mission of mercy after angering his future wife by playing cricket while Jonny Boukhobza was in magnificent form for the visitors, taking five wickets in a devastating spell.

With openers Rob Hewlitt and Andy Gorton dismissed for a combined 13, Sam Stephens and Mat Danks were at the crease when the first wave of weather came, drenching the wicket.

When play resumed, both were soon dismissed by Boukhobza – who took full advantage of the slippery conditions.

An excellent cameo by Stuart Slater – after an decent dayboo bowling performance – helped the total along before Boukhobza struck again with the playboy on five.

Following early dismissals for John Preece and Dave Stephens, it was left to Chris Hall and Ian Chuck to try and see The Elf home.

With the pairing building up a decent partnership, the clouds finally did their thing leaving the home side wondering what might possibly have been.

Batting		Runs
Gorton, A	c Raj b Boukhobza	2
Hewlitt, R	b Keogh	11
Stephens, S	b Boukhobza	25
Danks, M	b Boukhobza	1
Slater, S	b Boukhobza	5
Stephens, D	lbw Nasser	1
Chuck, Ian	not out	6
Preece, J	b Boukhobza	0
Hall, C	not out	8
Fell, R	DNB
Preece, D	MIA
Extras		7
Walsall Health	(match abandoned, 19 overs)	65

Bowling	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wickets
Stephens, S	4	1	8	0
Stephens, D	8	0	17	2
Hall, C	6	1	13	3
Chuck, I	5	1	10	0
Preece, J	4	1	16	1
Fell, R	3	0	10	3
Danks, M	2	0	8	0
Slater, S	3	0	18	0

 

Top bat: Sam Stephens (25)

Top bowler: Rich Fell 10 for 3

Rachel Hangover Rating: 8/10 (Rough as fugg, and Snapchat-tastic)

Rob Hewlitt (England) was the narrow victor of the first ever WHCC Masters, edging out Tom Davies (Wales), Ian Chuck (South Africa) and Mat Danks (Germany).

Hewlitt was comfortable with the course at Adventure Island Mini Golf at Star City, romping around the 36 holes in an impressive 87 shots.

Davies, who led the race for almost 20 holes before blowing up on the back nine, posted 89, a tie for second with Chuck.

Although finishing a distant last, amateur Danks can at least celebrate scoring two hole-in-ones.

The next event takes place on June 14.